In Which I Utterly Suck At This Whole Actress Selection Thing

Day 4 -- Prompt: In the movie version of your life, which actor/actress would play you and the significant players in your life? What kind of movie? What would the major plot points be, and how will it end?

I know lots of people think about this kind of thing often; I really don't. This seems an impossible prompt for me. I love television and movies and used to have a rather unhealthy trashy magazine habit, so I'm pretty familiar with a lot of actors and actresses that I might use to populate my movie.

My gut says to go with Sandra Bullock for me for my main adult life. She hasn't done a teacher movie yet, right? Haha. After that, my brain goes buzz. My brother would probably love to be played by Ryan Reynolds. But who to play my parents? Grandparents? My friends and lovers? I'm tapped out. So I'm choosing to slide right over the casting list and focus on the major plot points.

I think if you asked my parents, the beginning would be reminiscient of a horror movie, since apparenty I was a terrifying kid. Not, like, possessed terrifying, but just scary. For example:

Scene 1

Setting: Disneyland's The Haunted Mansion

Year: 1985

Age: 2.5

In line, about to ride The Haunted Mansion for the first time

Mom: Okay, Katie, now, this right might be scary, but just remember, it's just a ride. It's not real -- nothing will hurt you.

Katie: looks up, smiling. Exasperatedly. I know, Mommy. It's just a three dimensional, computer-generated, holographic image. It's not real.

Mom: long pause. Sighs. Okay, welp, I'm more afraid of you now than I've ever been of this ride.

My parents would clearly be prominent figures in this movie, as well as my brother. There would be a lot of traveling, and thus my grandparents would also figure prominently as well. I'd probably want some of the focus to be on my high school experience, and also on my college experience. My adult life is pretty boring, but it would kick a lot of ass to end up having a biopic about me because of my teaching life. You know, for revolutionizing teaching or something. But I'm not Dangerous Minds gnarly or Freedom Writer's Diary free to do what I want, really. So it's probably unlikely. But it could be fun.

I'd like it to be comedic at it's essence, because that's who I am, but a documentary also feels fun, too. Interviews of people -- as I'm thinking about this option, I'm loving this idea more. Why bother with actors and actresses? WHy not just actually have the people I love featured, telling stories about me, while at the same time, getting to tell stories about themselves and my family? I guess I've landed at the realization that I'd rather my movie be about me and how I fit into my family, rather than just me.

And the soundtrack will be AWESOME. Obviously. Lots of Paula Abdul and Hanson and No Use For a Name and the original Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack and Tracy Chapman and Huey Lewis and Paul Simon.

Roll credits